Dear Lovely, Stop Comparing Timelines

If time wasn’t a thing, what would you be doing right now? A picnic in a meadow with some cheese and a good book sounds lovely. No more rushing. No more thinking you’re running out of…time.

When we’re in our 20s, we think we have to know what we want to do with our lives. We have a plan. And right when we turn thirty we think–is that really the plan I wanted? Some may call this moment a “mid-life crisis” which to them I say, no. There’s a genre in books called coming-of-age. I’m sure you’ve heard of it. I believe we are always coming-of-age and it doesn’t necessarily mean a number.

Stop thinking you’re running out of time

I know you’re exhausted. Chasing this finish line to a goal that seems unattainable and with every new obstacle you start to question if everything you’re doing is even worth it. It’s the invisible clock that’s making you feel that way. If you had another year, would you feel better? If you had another hour, would you be able to finish? I think the concept of time is what feeds our stress.

My love, you are not running out of time because you are exactly where you need to be right now. I know you thought, planned, wished, worked so hard to get here. Can we take a second and just admire that? I’m not saying to take a trip down memory lane, unless you want to, but if you could go back and tell 15-year-old you that you’re doing the thing. That it might not look like you thought it would but gosh oh my gosh, hasn’t been quite the journey?

Stop comparing timelines

We’re always so worried about others. How far they are. How much more we have to go. What if I told you that every path is different. There is no timeline that is the same. Sure you might have a moment where you share a path with someone for a moment. Relish in the victory, together. That same person might decide to forge a different path after that victory with you and leave it all behind. What if you want to keep going? Are you afraid of doing it alone?

As you scroll on your phone to disassociate a few hours more, can you do me a favor? Can you not compare yourself to how others choose to control their narrative? Can you not compare yourself to someone else’s definition of success? Can you be gentle with yourself and remind yourself you’re doing your damn best? Can you keep your eyes on your own beautiful painting? Because it’s damn right exquisite and it’s all yours.

With love,